For years, I paid child support for my son, but when I got pictures of him, and he came to visit, he was skinny, and in clothes that were too small, torn, sometimes sick.  Make them show and keep the receipts of what they bought for my child, and make them keep them for a year.  I had indeed, paid child support for a brand new Mustang convertible for his mother and her boyfriend, to ride around in.  Child support ought to have a way to make SURE that the Child does receive the child support that is due HIM/HER

My husband gets scammed by his ex every time we turn around she needs money for something. She ask us to buy his school uniforms this time and she would buy the in the winter.We had offered to get shoes at the time. Now she is wanting new shoes for him.Now that we are broke. I have a child to start school too.She does not take care of him. He is 9 years old and she has let him gain weight so much she has made him have high-blood pressure now. He is up to 160.5 lbs and 9 years old. I feel sorry for him.She says she is putting him in one sports or another and me or my husband forks over the money for half of every sports she chooses but she ends up pocketing the money and just taking him to eat out at some all-you-can eat buffet.

Parents that are ordered to pay child support need to understand that not all money that is received for the child will be seen.  It is in the guidelines that the money be used for the childs needs which does include housing, utilities, clothing, and some transportation expenses. I have a 6 year old that I receive $260 a month to help with his expenses. As anyone who is responsible for a child knows GOES QUICK!! The rest of his expenses such as $400 a month in day care are also needed-it irks me to hear someone complain about their child support payment--if you question where the money goes then make a check payable to the event it should be used. SOMETIMES PARENTS GET SO INVOLVED IN THE ARGUMENT THAT THEY FORGET YOUR CHILD IS NOT HERE CAUSE HE WANTS TO BE HE IS HERE BECAUSE GOD CHOSE FOR YOU AND YOUR FORMER PARTNER TO BE BLESSED!! Parenting a child is hard whether you are a full time parent or the visitation parent but just think IT IS HARDER ON YOUR CHILD TO HEAR THE TWO OF YOU FIGHT OVER WHAT HE WANTS AND NEEDS--some children are still young enough they believe they are a problem!! AND NEVER SHOULD THE NEW GIRLFRIEND OR WIFE STEP IN TO INTERFER WITH A CHILD THAT IS NOT THEIRS BY BLOOD!! LOVE THAT CHILD LIKE THEY ARE YOURS BUT LEAVE ARGUMENTS UP TO THE PARENTS!!!

You guys that complain about paying child support and then complain about the kid being skinny and their clothes are old..have holes in them..Let me guess if the kid was fat and had expensive clothes on you would complain about that too wouldnt you?  Your ex does NOT have to dress your and HER kid to the nine at all times and to send to your house just to more than likely to leave good clothes behind when they need them when they are at home where 99.9% of thier life is going on and they need good clothes, why take the clothes to your house?  And be glad the kid is not fat, sounds to me like your child is getting some activities and not just sitting around doing nothing so sounds like mom may be spending that money on the child.  I can not stand how Exs and their NEW WIFES complain so much about how custodial mom spends that money.  first the new wife needs to but out of that plain and simple.  It is NOT your business what so ever and if you think it is..your sadly mistaken.  And Dad if you want to complain about the money and wanting reciepts...shut up and get over yourself.  Paying rent, mortgage lights, water, dont come free for her either. Does it for you?  Then why do you think it does for her?  And if mom does go out and buy HERSELF something..GOOD FOR HER!  she deserves to have something for herself after all I can assure you that most of her non disposable and disposable money goes towards the children not her.  And if you want to think that i am some bitter single mom think again..i am a father happily paying child support and where she spends HER money is non of my business what so ever. i help bring these kids into the world and i will help support them and if they need extra...i get it and dont ask..WHERE DOES THE SUPPORT I SEND GO?  i can assure you that the money i send is a hellll of a lot less than what she spends every month on those kids.  and not to mention she is a parent 24/7 i am a weekend dad..if i get to give the kids extra that makes me feel great to be able to do so.

I think this is a very good thing to do for the parents of children that are getting or suppose to be getting child support. I am a mother that is owed over $4000.00 in child support and do not get it regular. So how are you suppose to raise a child on $150.00 a month, but i only get $50.00 when it is sent. THANK YOU CARLINE THOMPSON

Not meaning to add fuel to a raging inferno here, but as a mother of three who is owed over $100,000 in support monies, I feel that the courts need to do a better job of ENFORCING support orders. I have left everything at the discretion of the courts, NEVER petitioned for an increase of support monies and have bent over backwards to keep them informed of my whereabouts and financial status. I have paid a high price for remaining off public assistance wherever and whenever possible, even at the expense of having support monies DUE ME AND MY CHILDREN awarded to the payer’s second wife due to her being on public assistance. ( The FEDERAL statutes dictate that any active public assistance case receive priority in financial offset collections, while those of us who work stand with our hands out.) I have even gone so far as to provide Support Enforcement Services with the correct information on my former spouses only to be told “ We cannot accept it from you because you the PAYEE may have stalked the PAYOR to obtain it” ,,, Kind of funny that the PAYOR was employed by a state agency in another state but they couldn’t locate him....

And having been the second wife who helped pay a spouse’s support obligation, I can understand the frustration that some feel at watching their predecessor drive a new vehicle at our expense. Life ain’t fair, it wasn’t meant to be easy, but there has to be a equalizer somewhere.  Now all I need to learn is if I can file a CIVIL action to collect the monies owed me and my children....

I dated this guy who had 2 children by 2 diffrent mothers. He was a great father who took care both of them from birth & basically brought them everything they needed. When i met him in 2005 he worked near here & he would have them everytime he was off & spent quality time with them! Then he started working off-shore & would go & get his son the minute he made it home & kept him the whole wk. & the daughter on weekends & when she was out of school. Both mothers often bragged about how he was such a good father, but when the son’s mother realized that he wasn’t going to be w/ her & he was going to be w/ me, out of spite she put him on child support. Not b/c that child wasn’t being taken care of but b/c she wanted 2 hurt us (which she told him). I loved those children as if they were mine & never mistreated them. When he went to court the judge which was a female didn’t want to see reciepts & that he had another child or anything. It was as if he was a dead beat father & was ordered to pay a great amount for 1 child. Forget the fact that he had another child & a life of his own! Then months later he was an inoccent by-stander & was beat to death w/ a bat. Now his children(son 5)& daugther(7)will never get a chance to know how much of a great father he was! But all they can do is cherish the memories that they can remember & how much he loved them. Not all fathers are dead beats . Some of the mothers use child support as an excuse to get back @ the fathers & the system lets them! The child sometimes is the 1 who suffers. Now don’t get me wrong i know that the mother has to provide a house hold for the child & it takes money 2 do so, but they didn’t consider anything on his behalf. Ask the mother now if he should have been treated that way & she’ll proudly tell anyone that he didn’t deserve it & that he was 1 of the greatest fathers in the world & even though he’s gone & the children have to grow up fatherless, she wouldn’t have traded him 4 nothing in the world! R.I.P. “the greatest father in the world!”

I agree with proudmomof1!!!!! God bless you in raising that child! I just pray parents get a grip on what is most important in life, and not the needs of themselves. Let’s face it you are probably divorced/split up because someone was being selfish. Stop focusing on you, and start focusing on that child, or in my case children God has entrusted you with. That goes for both parents of these kids, the payers, and recipients. Money is not everything, and material things won’t matter in the light of eternity. God has a plan and a purpose for you!

sounds like JustLilOlMe has a good ex that is legit in her spending.But not everyone has.Mine spends zero on my daughter.She does buy crystal, pot,beer,smokes,gas to run from one hard leg to another.I have her 6 arrest records in 3 years for possesion of all that + 3 DUI’s, I tried to get custody to no avail. As long as the state gets 5% of my payments their happy. Thats right, its not about the kids its the 5%. I asked the court to drug test her but no. I showed the D.A. her records and said these were times she was not working but racking up charges,I said drugs aint cheap nor free,who pays for her habit?I do thats who.She assaulted my daughter and I got custody by mandate which is revokable and didnt ask her for a penny for 11 months and she kept trying to hurt the situation so I filed for support from her and when she saw she was going to half to contribute for a change, she revoked the mandate got her back and not one thing I could do but before she got out of sight she was screaming for moneymoneymoney. So JustLilOlMe I ask you do you refer to the countless deadbeat dads which are a dime a dozen or all of us.Because Ive earned the right to complain any time I take a notion. Sounds to me like you arent over your ex and your still whipped! you get over her and find out what your buisness is.I can call a spade a spade any time I take a notion, does anybody care? NO, but Im just telling it like it is.And once more Im glad a little of your tax dollars supports her tail everytime she goes to jail and Im sure you dont mind, being as she deserves to spend a little on herself right.

mebuydruss4x for you info i am OVER my ex...as a matter of fact i live with my new gf who was married to a deadbeat and he even spouts off much of the same garbage that most deadbeats spout off about....a bunch of hot air but it all boils down to the same thing............ they dont want to pay so they look for reasons that dont exist, you have no right what so ever to assume the things about me that you did......you dont know me......how do we know your tellin the truth? maybe your actually one of them deadbeats huh?  dont like the speculation?  neither do i.  My ex and i just figure we werent meant to be married but we did and we made kids together so for their sake there is no sense in fighting and arguing. not all ex’s fight man......some of us are adults about it......i know that maybe hard for some people to believe that is your problem not mine....  and if you dont think being a single parent is hard then your sadly mistaken. if you think every dime of that money should be spent just on the kids your wrong again, grow up.  if my ex spends a bit on herself..so what....i know the kids are taken care of so that is my only concern.  not worrying about where every dime goes.....its not my business ....i am sure it would cost more if they lived here full time so to be a bit of a jerk i am getting off easy when it come to the monetary part of raising kids.  have you ever had to take a couple of kids into the store EVERY TIME you went in? trust me they ask for this and that and you do end up getting some of this and some of that.......it all addes up.....and mothers being how they are they go into a store with full intentions of buying herself something but puts either all or most back and end up gettign for the kids instead, thats how moms are....i had one and i live with one not my childs mom but a mom none the less.  have you had to walk behind a couple of kids that leave every electrical consuming thing on?  see next post

all them things requiring juice adds up too....have you had to tell a couple of kids TURN OFF THAT WATER!!!!!?? every drop adds up too.  have you ever got to just drive by a fair and not hear I WANT TO GO I WANT TO GO!!!?
you go whether you want to or not but you go and fairs arent cheap now days.... not to mention all the I wants I want and i want in between all of that other stuff...it all adds up....so if you for one minute think that your child support alone supports your ex and all of her bills and takes care of the kids.......your nuts....you dont pay that much bubba....your not donald trump by any means paying 50000 a month.......no way...you wouldnt be here whinning your song if you were you wouldnt have this problem if you were donald trump.  if it takes two jobs to get your kids back.get two jobs...after all if they are so in jeopardy arent they worth it?  if one judge tells you no then you really need a new lawyer who knows the laws better than the one you have now he is not doing you or your kids justice..

no judge would leave kids in a home like that........you cant say it because of the money you pay the state to collect your child support....again your 5% a month doesnt support the entire child support systm.....i dooubt you pay that much....what maybe they make the most of you a month 20bucks.....pLease who do you think pockets are being lined with that chump change?  that means you would be paying 400 a month in child support and if you think your ex is living high off the hog on that then you must be related to the Clampets and think that is a lot of money..and things are cheap now days.....you need to wake up...but let me guess your remarried or have a girlfriend that is helping to fuel this fire?  tell her to mind her own business....my gf doesnt get into mine nor do i hers..i just help take care of someones kid....no big deal though....i dont complain.....i knew going in that kid was part of the deal.....and you like a million others claim you ex is on drugs.....some claims are true most are not though.....some are just some pisssed off ex spouting off at the porthole in his face.......i seen a million guys like that.....god help us i know i will see a million more.....funny how there is more like you on here complaining than there are moms raising kids on their own with no help....goes to show they shut the hell up and do what they have to do with what they got.....they are the grown ups raising kids......

Look,Im gonna try to address this with a Christian attitude.If I assumed something about you thats not true Im sorry.The fact is you also judged me before I even posted any comment.You first were complaining and I join you in not wanting to hear some no count sire babbling on and on.I have more kids and 2 grandchildren.I try to set good moral examples and offer good holsum values.I have absolutely no reason to lie whatsoever.I know my support+all extras I give because I do make sure I do my part,do not alone support them.She manipulates and abuses state funds and benefits for the rest of it.This Law system is so fouled up it doesnt even support itself,it only suits itself.I promise you I have the records I claim to have.But as far as my wife minding her buisness, she has done more for my child than her mother ever will do and thats a fact.She makes it her buisness every time she takes time to make sure my daughter has all she needs and more.She has absolutely went above and beyond her part and did so with pleasure.I do excatly what I half to do and more,I love my kids as much as anyone loves any kid.

And the main problem if not the only problem I have with what you posted is all of us do not have such great situations as you and Im sure lots of others have.I can say that you should count your blessings because it truly could be worse for you and your kids.Yes there are alot of people whining that have absolutely no reason whasoever to ever complain.But some are in a catch 22 situation.I was in a wreck and suffered a fractured neck and could not work for 2 years and never once did I get behind on my support.I do take pleasure in providing for my kids but that doesnt mean that I half to rollover for the way that the law in every situation works.I thank God I have a voice and an opinion,And in these United States I can express them.I hope you and yours the best, but I will never stop telling the truth.